英语笑话大全
笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。小编精心收集了爆笑简短英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
爆笑简短英语笑话篇1
A Pleasant Surprise
A friend of mine had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husbandinsisted they were an extravagance. She went to visit her mother for two weeks, and whenshe returned, she was overjoyed to find that beautiful new cabinets had been installed.
A few days later a neighbor came over to visit my friend. After admiring the new cabinets, theneighbor added, "All of us were so glad that the fire your husband had while you were gone wasconfined to the kitchen. "
惊喜
我朋友有很长一段时间一直想在厨房添置一些厨柜，但她丈夫坚持说这是铺张浪费。她去娘家过了两周，回到家来，发现厨房里新添置了漂亮的厨柜，这令她喜出望外。
几天后，邻居来拜访我朋友。欣赏了新厨柜后，邻居说：“你不在家的时候，你丈夫弄失了火。我们都深感庆幸只是厨房遭了殃。”
爆笑简短英语笑话篇2
An Adult Decision
The year before my son turned 18, he constantly pleaded to be allowed to a tattoo, but Irefused to sign permission for one. He argued that soon he would be a man and he should beable to make adult decisions. Sure enough, a few days after his 18th birthday, he come homewith a tattoo. Although I was not happy about this, I was curious to see what symbol ofmasculinity he had chosen. There, on his shoulder, was a two-inch image of Mickey Mouse.
成年人的抉择
我儿子十八岁前的那一年，他常常向我提出准许他文身。但我拒绝允许他这样做。他争辩说他不久就要成为男子汉了，并说他应该能够作出成年人的抉择了。果然，十八岁生日的几天后，他文了身，回到家里。尽管我对此感到不高兴，但出于好奇，我想看看他选择了什么雄性象征物。原来是他在肩上文了一个两英寸长的米老鼠像。
爆笑简短英语笑话篇3
You're Not Going to Make it
Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physicianmotioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway.
"Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do toensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him astress-free environment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate loveto him every day.
On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?"
"I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it."
你活不成了
一个人得了重病，妻子伴随他去看医生。检查过后，医生示意病人的妻子到走廊见他。
“你丈夫病得很重，”医生说，“但有三件事可保住他的性命。第一，一日三餐，要营养美味。第二，给他一个轻松的环境，不要抱怨。第三，每天都对他倾注炽热的爱。”
在驱车回家的路上，丈夫问道：“医生说了什么?”
“很遗憾，”妻子说，“你活不成了。”
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